Cranky claim jumper.

HB's charming roommate: "HB was taking a nap and I was bored."
Syrup: "Pounce on her. She loves that."
HB: "No pouncing! I needs m'naps."
S: "You sound like a cranky claim jumper."
HB: "That's my alternate persona, Willie "Naps" McLogvaulter."

The horse your man could smell like.

Boyfriend J (attempted sexy Old Spice man voice): "I'm on a horse."
Syrup: "Hahahahaha..you don't sound like him at all!...you sound like the horse!"

Enneagram Test

Apparently I'm a type six?

COMPLETELY UNRELATED.

S (in a haze of sickness): "There's a web of mucus in my throat...ahh, skeet skeet motherf---[boyfriend J squishes my cheek with his forehead]--no, not on my face!"
Roommate (in living room, unable to see us): [endless laughter]

On "that time of the month"...

Syrup: "Aaahhh! Pearl Harbor!"

Karen Cristo

The eldest daughter of Ken and Theresa, who neglected and ignored her. Karen was desperate, needy, and always trying to get with the men in town--but she was constantly rejected. (Hashbrowns: "They saw the crazy behind her eyes and ran.") Once tried to kill someone. For years she was in love with Christi's husband, Eric, until his untimely death (not caused by Karen).

Tutuk Native American

The crazier daughter of the Native American family.