Tip guilt.

S: "Oh no, I forgot to tip the lady who cut my hair!"

...

Ten minutes later...

...

S: "I can't believe I didn't tip her!"
The Father: "Geez, you'd make a great Catholic."

It's like ten thousand spoons, when all you need is a knife.

At Baskin Robbins...

The Father: "Oh look, ice cream cones on an ice cream cake. That's ironic."
Syrup: "That's not ironic, Alanis!"

Five minutes later...

Syrup (singing): "It's the good advice you just didn't take, it's like ice cream cones on an ice cream cake..."
The Father: "Shut uuuup. Just for that, you get the clown cake."

Otters > Everything Else

I showed Hashbrowns this video:



Her reaction?

"You can train them!? Is it carrying the letter with its hand!? Holy sh**, otters are better than everything!!"

Jason DeRulo

I actually quite like the sound of his song, "Watcha Say," BUT I HATE THE MESSAGE.

I was listening to it with Hashbrowns, and when he says "I was caught up in her lust / when I don't really want no one else..."

S: "Oh, so it was HER fault. I see."
H: "You always do this when you hear this song..."
S: "Well, it's bullsh**."
H: "Yea. He's like, 'We tripped, and our pants fell down, and I accidentally ended up in her, and we went "Whoops!" and then you walked in.'"
S: "Exactly."

Panty poltergeist.

Possibly a misquote, but too good not to include:

Kiki: "I have a presence in my underwear."

FarmVille.

I read this aloud to Hashbrowns:

"Behind me while I was sitting in Driver’s ED working on a packet, a group of intimidating football guys had gathered and were discussing how they had done in the game last week. One of them brought up the after party, and another said “No man, I had to go home and harvest my crops on FarmVille” They all accepted this as a legitimate answer, and then discussed how their plants were doing. IMMD"

She cracked up, then said, "In the future, no one will even know how much of an impact FarmVille had on our lives...even though I hear alarms go off all the time, only for a friend to announce, 'Sorry, I have to go harvest my pumpkins.'"

Non-Quote: Pearl Giveaway

Kiki has mourned her the loss of her elegant long pearl necklace ever since it went missing after Hashbrowns's prom. I would love to win this giveaway so I could buy her a new necklace, even though it could never replace the other one.

The giveaway is held here, at French Charming's blog, and the store offering the giveaway is PearlNecklaceSource.com.